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August 31, 2009 Jungle Fever : A 2009 Observation

Jungle Fever
I was recently at lunch with a friend, and while we were in line ordering our food, we noticed a couple sitting in the restaurant that triggered a discussion between the two of us that lasted the duration of our lunch break. This couple was a perfect example of an observation that we both have shared for awhile, and that has “bugged” us on a few levels. In recent years obviously rap and hip hop has reached a global mainstream popularity. Not only has the music in its self been loved and received by many, but the culture behind the music has been embraced by all races. In turn the artists have began to show on many levels, the same admiration and integration for different styles and cultural trends. This in many ways has done so much for our communities in terms of the way we view each other, and how we coexist as different walks of life, which is a beautiful thing. But this “observation” that my friend and I have had, and what this article will discuss, is one of the many examples of how that beautiful thing sometimes gets skewed, and how people can get confused about who they are, and the importance of being responsible about the way you interact with people.

Now, from the looks of it the couple seemed to be a suburban white girl and a regular black man. Before I go any further with this article, let me make it perfectly clear that I am not racist, and have nothing wrong with interracial relationships. What I do have a problem with however, is when a relationship is not genuine, and when people base at least the initial stages of a relationship off superficial reasons.

So to get to the point of what I’m really saying, is that it seems to be the “fashionable” thing to do for a lot of girls, especially from the suburbs, that listen to rap and hip hop, to date a black guy. That it’s now a status symbol, or a way to make them look cool. It seems that for a lot of them, it makes them feel like they now have a legitimate connection to the rap world, and a self assurance that they can now be an official member of this culture. I can’t tell you how many girls I have known over the past few years who are into rap and hip hop, who only date black guys, and if they do date anyone else its very rare. This obviously makes the relationships for these particular girls extremely superficial. It turns the men that they go after into some kind of trophy or accessory. Not only do they need that new Louis Vuitton purse, but they need a black guy on their side as well. This in the end sets them up for failure for one reason. Black guys are very much aware of what is going on, and they take every advantage of this. They know that these girls are so sprung off them, that they can do whatever they want without much effort, and then easily drop them. Can we say Hit it and Quit it? Yes Ladies that’s exactly what you’re setting yourself up for.

The couple in the restaurant fit this relationship stereotype to the T. You could just tell that this girl was completely crazy over him, and he was just sitting there with this demeanor that he could care less about the girl that was in front of him. There was even about a 5 minute period where he was on the phone talking to someone else, not even looking at his date, and she was still sitting there salivating, and gazing at him like he was some kind of supernatural being. Now I am in no way saying that these observations are true for everyone who is into rap and hip hop and in an interracial relationship, because they’re not. But that seems to be the case for a large number of people, and you know what? It’s STUPID! If you’re into something but can’t completely relate, especially music, then just listen to it and enjoy it for what it is. If you want to feel like you are a part of something, then be a part of it. But still be true to yourself, you are what you are, and no one can change that for you. Stop dating people for superficial reasons, you should like someone for who they are, and not for some ideal or lifestyle you think they represent just because of the color of their skin, or because you know it will be an easy lay.